Last Thursday, in an act of defiance, the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, despite international warnings not to do so, launched a rocket which they claimed to be a satellite, but which everyone else knew to be a long-range missile test.
On Tuesday, Rick Santorum announced that he was ending his bid for the White House.
This week, Paul Ryan caters to millionaires, Sarah Palin plays Katie Couric, and it’s Romney by a nose!
This week, the president’s healthcare mandate is being fought over at the Supreme Court, sales of the Etch A Sketch soared thanks to Mitt Romney’s campaign, and the Speaker of the House may have proven that you should never negotiate with him.
As the Republican presidential race drags on, there has been no shortage of headlines made by the ever-dwindling list of candidates hoping to run against Barack Obama to lead the free world.
The following is a cache of emails recently declassified by the offices of New York Governor Andrew Cuomo and New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg.
We, the members of the Congressional Tea Party caucus, present our first formal list of demands, which we will soon introduce on the floor as HR-666. Our nation is in peril and for it we can no longer stand. We face mounting debts at the state and national level, we have government entering every home, school and church in America, and we need change.
It was misty that Monday night. Fog hung thick over the Potomac. There was nary a sound for miles. The noise of reporters, camera flashes and Greek choruses had quieted. Streetlights changed color for no one, except perhaps the odd lobbyist scurrying into his trashcan. After all the speculating and graphing and rebranding and redistricting and speaking and speaking and speaking, the city was asleep. All were resting. All, except for one man.
“Don’t make me angry. You won’t like me when I’m angry,” spat Karl. He’d be damned if he let some senile old waiter bring out a tray of canapes without doilies. Without doilies! Might as well ration the butter and sleep with Stalin’s corpse.
It’s on roughly a third of all laptops in any given lecture hall, and one of your suitemates is, I guarantee, playing it right now. A Columbia student recently featured on the Who Wants to Be a Millionaire website revealed to the Spec his study habits: “I just did a lot of Sporcle and hoped for the best.” Welcome to the world that Sporcle has created.
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